Month: July 2021

My crew and I cruised through another holiday season with little to no fanfare. I was back to working full time now and in full recovery mode, both in business and in health. The last six years were the ultimate test in survival. I had a tremendous amount of support from my family and a tremendous amount of support from my vendors. It was now time to pay back the massive amount of bills, taxes and invoices that had been postponed or pushed aside in my absence. The holiday rush helped the situation a little but it would be up to me now to retake the helm with what I hoped would be a relapse free existence. I was still expected to be front and center every month at Dr. Dave’s office to monitor my blood counts. They still needed to improve and it would be some time until normalcy would be a reality. At least, I hoped it would. Fatigue and other maladies were still a regular part of my daily routine. While Gleevec did its job, it did a job on me. No time to whine.

I began obtaining all of the necessary permits and estimates for the new store on Cottman Avenue. This was a big job. I built my own stores so the costs for construction were always lower than the norm. Having the ability to GC my own job let me have control over my time between running the store and guiding/participating in the construction. The months between February and October of 2002 would be very busy. I would go from selling diamonds and gold to building partition walls, painting and coordinating my subs. Seven days a week. This constant movement exhausted me physically but helped me mentally. I had no time to dwell on the past few years. I could only move forward to the future as I watched every penny go from one store to the other. Lol, I was used to that though. This would be my sixth move in fourteen years. I could only hope that this move may be my final for a long time. The location was excellent. Twenty four hundred square feet of space, next door to a Hallmark Card and Gift store. A large shopping strip mall on a main road with great visibility. I was pretty psyched. As long as my health stayed in check, this would be my comeback.

The next eight months leading up to our grand opening in the new location were very eventful as expected. I added to the fray by jumping into more responsibility by helping coach Nick’s baseball team in Upper Moreland in the spring and then Joey’s first Mite ice hockey team at the Wintersports Royals club in the fall. My hands were full but my heart was even fuller. I was in heaven. Not the heaven that I had dreaded the past six years but the heaven that was being here for my family. The mental abyss that had plagued me inside for so long was diminishing with every swing of the bat. Every goal that was scored. Every smile that shined so brightly on my boys faces. I had so much to live for. But, I knew that. That’s what I fought for all of these years.

Time was flying and everything was falling into place. I have to admit it…I was good. The last few weeks before and right up to the grand opening were hectic as hell. The new sign was going up, the new counters all going in, all of the special lighting and new fixtures being installed. The finishing touches all mattered so much. I was buying like crazy too. I needed the inventory to match the size of the store. Diving deeper in debt was not unusual. Inventory is your lifeblood in the jewelry business. The opening would be heading right into the holiday season as I had engineered it to be. Advertising was ramped up, new employees were hired and everyone was working up to the last minute. We closed the Bustleton avenue location for three days to move my safes and office furniture. Two more days after to merchandise, train and organize. It was go time.

Once again, a rinse and repeat season! The new store was a huge success. Our customers loved the layout, the new merchandise and the new location. Business boomed, especially with the Hallmark Card store right next to us. Location, location, location. Things were good. Life was good. A lot going on. I could handle it. No pressure, no diamonds. Yep… but no remission.

Next up: Library Science

Time was moving at a more relaxed and in much less stressful of a pace. It was the summer of 2001 and I began my first foray into coaching Baseball with Nick. I was trying to feel so much better, both in body and mind. Gaining weight and gaining confidence. My quarterly bloodwork was showing astonishing results. My White counts were virtually normal as well as my other pertinent blood markers. My PCR results were encouraging too. There was no more need for the dreaded bone marrow aspirations as the protocol testing was behind me but the statistics were being kept just the same. My Hemoglobin was still not recovering as well as expected but the fatigue was not holding me back. I was focused on my goal. A full hematalogical response. No sign of any CML in my bone marrow or blood. Hopefully the drug will live up to expectations and rid me of this burden.

My store was rolling along and we were making a real go of it at our new location. The hours were shorter and we had two days off now with our customers getting comfortable with the change of venue. I was getting back to the groove and back to a normal life again. That didn’t last too long. I received a letter from my new landlord that my new location was to be torn down and replaced by a Target Department store. The letter stated that within one year, I needed to vacate the premises and my lease would be terminated. Well, lucky me! I really didn’t have enough going on at the time…did I? I was offered, as a consolation, a store around the corner on Cottman Avenue. In a larger shopping center with greater visibility, the store was a former ice cream shop that had been vacant for some time. The landlord would help with the relocation and give me free rent for four months as a perk for being such a good sport. It was my only option. Here we go again. November 2002 would be our target to complete the move just in time for the Christmas rush. There was a lot of prep, construction, money and time involved with this one. Time to prepare.

My staff and family were caught off guard just as much as I was. After barely a minute to relax, more stress and much more work lie ahead. We were heading into the fall season. The warmup to Christmas and the mayhem that comes with it. First thing first, we finish the holiday season then plan for the move. But I also had other things going on. The battle that I had just went through over the last year and a half, and so far was playing in my favor, had done a number on my psyche. Mentally, unbeknownst to mostly everyone, I was in horrible shape. The quiet, internal, intense test of my will to live “Again”, had changed me. To fight on through the daily rigors of the onslaught of bad news, bad test results, bad everything day after day…week after week. The misery was constant and relentless. Remission. I was in remission back in 1999. No more. It was two years later and the “R” word had still escaped me. It’s all I wanted. All that I needed again. Dr.Dave couldn’t give me an answer either. I was a Guinea pig still. A test dummy. An empty shell waiting to be filled with the hope of yet another birth. A rebirth that could maybe make me whole again. Cancer takes such a huge physical toll on you. Mentally, it’s worse. I needed to hear that word again. “Remission”. How about it Dr. Dave? I’m hurtin.

Next up: The Big Move.

My next blog was supposed to be about Remission. This is not. This blog is about a special person in my life. A person that I met many years ago that had probably the most profound impact on my life that one could ever imagine. It has been many years since we last spoke but the unforgettable gesture of wisdom that this young man imparted upon me will forever be ingrained in the story of my life.

A very professional, humble, soft-spoken and gentile person, Ed Ciecko was just a little bit older than me and had just begun his first week in a new medical office. I hadn’t been to a doctor in ten years and when I called for an appointment to see a doctor at my new primary office in Northeast Philly, they only had appointments available with Dr. Ciecko. I have mentioned him prior in the beginning of my blog, if you remember back that far. I made the appointment to see him about a lingering cough and cold but his offer to run some bloodwork on that Monday, May 21st, 1996, to have me on record, was the decision that saved my life. He called me two days later on the 23rd at 8:00 am, with an appointment he already set, to be at the Hemotologist at Frankford Torresdale Hospital by 9:00 am. “I need you to go there right away, there are some inconsistencies in your bloodwork that we need to follow up with.”, was all he said. This was the first volley fired at me in my 25 year plus battle with Leukemia. Pressed for more information, he kindly implored me to be at the Hemotologist by 9am… no delay please. I’m sure he knew the dilemma that was confronting me. He just wanted to be 100 percent. Without his request, persistence and insight, I may not be here today.

I received information today that Dr. Ciecko passed away this weekend unexpectedly at 62 years old. Still practicing medicine. Still helping so many people all of these years. There is an outpouring of love online with countless stories of his amazing ethic and professionalism. He was a special doctor. A special man. A lifesaver to myself and so many others. I am heartbroken. Life can be so unfair. This is one of those moments.

Rest peacefully Doc. With love and utmost respect…I Thank You❤

I realized that as I was navigating the waters of the medical world, the working world, the youth sports world and the friends and family world….relationships were the veins of life. Think about it. You have to cohabitate with your coworkers many hours a day and make things work. Businesses have to run smoothly and depend on a certain amount of trust among employees that can work together to produce a quality product to sell at market. In my instance, excellent relationships between my employees and myself were the key to a successful collaboration and successful business. I strive for that. This cohesive crew, happy crew, would translate to happy clientele and fabulous business. Therefore…excellent relationships with our customers. Our relationships continue to flow happily and generously through our wholesale vendors. So important these relationships were. To bring the finest, prettiest pieces of jewelry to market, our vendors were key. Their input and various styles of jewelry and fine diamonds and gemstones were the cornerstone of my business. I dealt with many to always have a spectacular array of fine jewelry for our customers to choose from. Relationships.

Relationships with young children when teaching them skills in sports like soccer, baseball and ice hockey, especially from a young age, are so fulfilling. Watching these young athletes complete different skill levels and increase their skills week by week is especially exciting to the coach…me! Their faces smiling ear to ear , scoring goals, navigating the bases or the blue line. Fabulous! Relationships with the athletes parents. Tentative to say the least. Expecting so much of their children, and their coaches to get them there. Sometimes an impossible feat but every child got the same treatment and somewhat more attention if needed. Teaching manners, ethics and sportsmanship was paramount to the whole package. And fun. The most important aspect of your job. Work hard, play hard, have fun! Relationships with the parents were always good, bad or ugly. I always tried to keep it good.

The most satisfying relationships that I had were with the huge array of talented and compassionate medical staff who saved my life. The relationship that you have and grow with for a very long time. The doctors, the nurses, the phlebotomists, the techs, the custodial staff, the surgeons, the specialists, the kitchen staff and the administration. They have the responsibility to make you feel safe and secure, alleviate your many anxieties, take care of you pre and post surgery and counsel you when you are just feeling like hell. Kudos to them.

The most important relationship you actually have is the one gets you through it all. The one that is there for you when things get bad, get scary, get emotional and get better. The people that show you how much you are loved. That show you that anything can be beaten down…Cancer specifically. Yes…love conquers all. My wife, my boys, my parents, my siblings and friends. My Rocks. Relationships.

The relationship that I had with myself was special too. The battle was still raging. The counts were still all out of whack. The fatigue was debilitating. The relationship with myself…tiring. Mentally exhausting. With all of the relationships that I had going on in my life though? They all had my back. A village of hope and a desire of all..to help me succeed.

What more could a guy ask for!

Relationships….I had the best.

Next Up: The Next Phase- Remission

As I listen to the sounds of fireworks all around me, I remember all of the fun 4th of July’s that we had with the boys and our family. I am writing my blog tonight down at the seashore on Long Beach Island. It sounds like World War Three right now. The rockets red glare, bombs bursting in air is in full effect. A glaring difference to last year’s Covid summer. It’s so wonderful to see all of the families celebrating here, the barbecues, the walkers and bike riders, the beach goers and laughter all around. “We’re back America!”

Fade back to spring of 2001. I was beginning to feel alive again. Slowly moving forward everyday on the path of wellness and hematalogic remission. Before my body began to betray me again following my second Doner Lymphocyte Infusion a year ago, I was able to take Joseph out on the ice for his first ice skating lesson. He was three and a half years old and ever so eager to get out there. Hell, he was just in nursery school. I bought him a hockey helmet and some warm gloves and off we went. I rented him figure skates to start, just to see how it would play out. He loved it! After the usual boards grabbing, getting his legs, warm up, off he went. We had such a great time. Joe was a natural. This was the first and last time for a while though. I was going down hill very fast and the Interferon was debilitating me. You know the story.

Joe was now four and a half and raring to go. I started picking him up at his pre-k around noon every Wednesday, taking him to the Face Off Circle arena. He was totally outfitted in a complete set of Hockey equipment, hockey skates, pants, gloves, shin pads, stick, etc, with an attitude to seal the deal. The kid had mounds of confidence. Lookout big guys, here I come. I literally dropped him through the door of the boards and said good luck buddy! Baptism by fire. Get out there, stay low, don’t skate in front of or behind the net. Missiles were flying everywhere. A couple weeks in, he was participating in scrimmages with the men out there! I had his back though. He was not even five years old yet. They loved him though and took care of him too. This was the beginning of Joe’s love for the game of Hockey. And my resurgence into coaching. I had boys. All guys want boys. Especially sports guys.

We lived in Upper Moreland Township at the time. A big sports town. Their baseball complex was among the best you would ever see! I was fortunate to coach Nick and Joe in Soccer and Baseball for many seasons, Hockey at our local arena- The Wintersports Royals and the Upper Moreland Middle school hockey team. I enjoyed so much the relationships that I formed with all of the young boys and girls that I was so fortunate to coach. I always felt great when they called me “Coach”. I always took my job seriously and my goal was to teach sportsmanship , skills and humility. Work hard, play hard, play fair and win. Life lessons. Also had to play the politics too. They were the worst part of being a coach. I played the game though. Never a dull moment. I’ll get into some ” You won’t believe this shit” moments, later. But for now, times were great. Gleevec was doing its job. I had both of my boys on the ice. Nick was becoming a smooth skater. Joe was tearing it up. I was in my glory…. and life was getting better. Day by day.

Next up: Relationships